The big 51

Butch and I have been married for 51 years today.  Wow!  That is so hard to believe because it only seems like yesterday we were this young couple starting out on a new adventure called marriage.  We began our life together in an upstairs flat of about 432 square feet (the apx size of today's tiny homes). How we managed that is amazing to me.  I suppose that is the reason we know we could not function in a tiny home today.

No one prepares you for married life.  Most young couples believe it will be sunshine and daisies all the time.  But eventually the honeymoon ends and married life really begins.  In my opinion, marriage is a journey of hills and valleys.  It is a journey that begins with 2 people learning to live with each other with all their similarities and differences, it's knowing you won't always agree on everything and sometimes compromise is necessary, it's finding a way to talk to each other about what really matters, and it's knowing someone has your back no matter what.  There will be bad times but giving up is not an option.  You need to keep moving because eventually you will get thru it together.  Another important thing that should be part of a marriage is a sense of humor.  Sometimes with everything going on in your life, the best thing to do is laugh.

Of course, the most important part of any marriage is Love.  Not the kind of love that burns in a moment of passion but the kind of love that continues thru the day to day routine of life: burnt dinners, dirty diapers, unemployment, bills, arguments, teenagers, those annoying little habits we all have, etc.  That is the love that is the strongest and will continue; as it has and will continue for Butch and I for 51 years and beyond.

In 51 years, my husband and I have encountered our fair share of mountains and valleys.  We have seen friends and family end their marriages for one reason or another.  We have, in the heat of the moment, threatened to leave the other and go it alone.  But in the end, we always start climbing the mountain again...together.

I remember something my mom told me the morning of my wedding day when, in my nervous state, I asked her how she and dad had stayed together so long.  She said, "When those times come and you are not sure you are on the right path with the right one, think about tomorrow or next week or next month or next year.  How do you see it...alone or with him?  That will be your answer."

In 51 years of mountains and valleys, I have never been able to picture my life without him.

I am reminded this day of this quote...

                                           “I may not have ended up where I intended to go,
                                           but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.”

                                                                                             ~ Douglas Adams
 

 6-22-1973

 

                                                                         6-22-2024